The year is drawing to a close but the name train keeps on chugging. Headlining this month's column: a cat named for all the foods, a four-letter pet name inspired by a Disney sorceress, and a literary pun for all the bookhounds out there.
1. Cheeto Bean Burrito
Animals named after food? Pretty common. Animals named after all the foods? That's some what the heck word salad.
2. Jorts, JNCO, Top Hat, Turtleneck & Pocket Lint
Tag yourself, I'm Top Hat, the one in the middle who just flopped dramatically to the ground.
3. Baroness von Peanut butter Cat'n Crunchiez
Because we will never not stan pets with ridiculous honorifics.
4. Apollinaris, Beelzebub, Blatherskite, Buffalo Bill, Satan, Sin, Sour Mash, Tammany, Zoroaster, Soapy Sal & Pestilence
Surprising: Mark Twain was apparently a big cat dude. Less surprising: He had a knack for pinning some terrific handles on his four-legged pals. Like, say, Soapy Sal and Pestilence (?!?!?).
The things you can learn on Twitter these days....
5. Porkchop Hammingway
Speaking of great American writers (how's that for a perfect pivot?), another noted cat dude, Ernest Hemingway, is in the inspiration for the pigly pun above. There's probably a Moveable Feast joke in here somewhere but I just can't seem to finesse it out.
PREVIOUSLY: November's Coolest Pet Names
We've seen letter jumbles pass for pet names before but Yzma here is actually named after a Disney villain, which — confession — I did not know. Credit that assist to this lengthy list of pet names inspired by Disney characters which I found on this very website.
A pup named after a geometry concept? We'll cosine on that. But no matter how you do the math, cute angles > acute angles, always & forever.
Quilty, a cat who rocketed to internet fame after he was caught repeatedly jailbreaking his fellow felines from a closed room at a Houston-area shelter, has since found his forever home. The hijinx, it seems, have come to an end but the legend — and the name — will live on.
Commence with the room-to-room turbo dashes because Booster is a terrific name for a rambunctious catto — or just one that lives to loaf and loafs to live.
It's not just an expresh: Some people really do have pet Peeves!
PREVIOUSLY: July's Coolest Pet Names
Ancestry.com claims that Holten is German for "small wood" or "stony hill" but to these ears it's the sort of name a supporting character from a snobbish family on a weekly drama set in a tony East Coast prep school might have. Also: 'dem ears!
Haha, that is the look of a chonky cat who has seen some serious sh*t.
13. Captain Waffles
I suppose there's a possibility that the Captain prefixing Waffles is but an embellishment on the captioner's part but I'm going to feign complete and utter indifference until authorities report otherwise.
Google Translate refuses to lend confirmation to this but Pitzki is apparently Hebrew for "tiny one" and well, it seems pretty apt for this pocket-sized tuxedo kitteh.
I don't know what Prismo means but I sure do like the way it rolls off the tongue.
PREVIOUSLY: August's Coolest Pet Names
16. General Cutie & Mr. Chicken
Cats with funny names sporting cozy sweaters. That's it, that's a future list.
Reminder: You can share your pet's name — unusual or otherwise — with us on Facebook, which is how Theodorable, the pom with fantastic hair pictured above, trended onto our radar.