This is What Happens When Roomba Runs Over Dog Poop

It’s the situation every dog owner dreads — you come home, take a sniff, and realize that your mostly-housetrained dog has, um, had an accident. Gross as it is when your dog answers nature’s call in the house, the situation can usually be remedied in a moment with some paper towels and a quick jog to the bathroom to flush the evidence. Okay, a little longer if it was on the carpet. And WAY longer if there’s a Roomba involved.

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So begins the tragic tale of Jesse Newton of Little Rock, Arkansas who sets his Roomba to clean his living room floor every night at 1:30 AM. Unfortunately, Evie had an accident of the number two variety after the family went to bed which Newton became aware of when his 4-year-old son crawled into bed with Newton and his wife Kelly, smelling like you-know-what.

In a Facebook post Newton penned August 9th that has since been shared over 300,000 times, he describes the incident as “...the Pooptastrophe. The poohpocalypse. The pooppening.” A couple paragraphs down he gets more graphic, describing what happened to his living room that night as “a Jackson Pollock poop painting.”

“It will be on your floorboards,” Newton warns. “It will be on your furniture legs. It will be on your carpets. It will be on your rugs. It will be on your kids' toy boxes. If it's near the floor, it will have poop on it. “

Newton drew a diagram of the monstrosity to accompany his Facebook post and it’s a total horror movie, we’re kind of surprised that Newton made it through the night alive.

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Image: Facebook (Jesse Newton)

After disassembling the Roomba and tossing it in the bath to soak, Newton proceeded with the most-unenviable task of cleaning the living room, using a carpet shampooer, spray bottle with bleach water, steam mop, and several rolls of paper towels to tackle the disaster, finally going to bed at 6 AM, only to wake up the next morning and discover that the Roomba had fritzed out in the bathtub. RIP Roomba, but also, you kind of had it coming, dude.

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Image: Facebook (Jesse Newton)

The good news is, Newton did manage to get all the puppy poop out of his house and the place Newton bought the Roomba from gave him a free replacement for the Roomba that was lost in that night of unspeakable horrors. Just because all’s well that ends well doesn’t mean Newton wants us forgetting about this pooptastrophe anytime soon.

“Remember — don’t let your Roomba run over dog poop,” Newton concludes his post.

Um, we will DEFINITELY remember. Promise.