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cat Names: mary+jane

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Mary Jane

Activities: Sprawling out to impersonate Shamu, eating roses my mother plainly places on the coffee table for my taking, running from everything, being contemplative as I whack people in the legs with my gorgeous tail, defiantly clawing the rug while staring my mother in the face and inherently being amused at how much she can yell, climbing the desk chair with my precise talons as though it is a large pine tree, getting my ass kicked by my sister, agilely jumping up to the high windowsill which my sister cannot do even though I am by far more voluptuous, being unabashedly photogenic, attacking the legs of sleeping humans, sashaying down the hallway, and sitting and grooming myself wherever my mother would like to sit.

Favourite Furniture: under the coffee table, bottom left-hand corner of bed

Favourite Treats: Cat nip. Omfg. The stuff rawks. I also love corn on the cob (mom has to hold it for me otherwise it rolls all over!) and rosebuds.

About Me: Mom saved me from the Hermitage Cat Shelter back in 2005, after I climbed in her lap and claimed her as my human.

I was unfortunately abused before becoming a Dugan, so I have an irrational fear of large men and objects that make noise like dustbusters and hairdryers...I once bit my poor mom in the throat because I got so frightened I went into Tasmanian devil mode. Luckily, she healed and didn't get rid of me.

I usually have no idea of what is going on.

My sister is a huge bitch, but we have a love-hate relationship. Basically I love her, but she pretends to hate me but actually loves me. I have clawed her in the eyes on three separate occasions to put her in her place. Hooker.

I shed all over the god damned place.