Because LOL + WTF, your guess is as good as ours.
1. "Look, they don't call me a chick magnet for nothing."
2. "Dude! Tag me in!! Tag me in BRO!!!"
3. "Jeez, she's taking this bucket list thing kind of literally, don't ya think?"
4. Gossiping cat #1: "He took a job with the bank even though he was overqualified." Gossiping cat #2: "Why?" Gossiping cat #1: "Because he really kneaded the dough."
5. "I drink to forget."
6. "Honestly, I'm not really feeling the Track Bar on the new MacBook Pros ..."
"... but I wouldn't say no if you wanted to make it our mane computer.
7. "A bet's a bet. Time to pay up, Dad."
8. Needs cash for new socks.
9. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
10. "Wait, my photobomb got who's seal of approval?"
11. "When I don't buy a ticket for the train, and the fare collector steps into the car."
12. "Regrets? Yeah, I've had a mew ... "
13. "This is my beach body."