There are two types of people in this world: Those who costume their pets on Halloween and those who don’t.
That’s the lesson from an extremely rigorous and scientific review — buttons lab coat slowly for effect — we conducted over the weekend. Having dug through timelines both popular and a measure more obscure, we can say with certainty that these are some of the very best takes on the topic.
Because you can’t spell Halloween without LOL, here then are 25 musings about pets at Halloween that will have everyone nodding along in agreement (“it me,” all readers reading this) as they furiously click on the "retweet", "like", and "follow" buttons.
1. Let’s ease into our list with something uncontroversial and a total no-brainer.
2. Some people naturally prefer the company of animals over people … and that’s alright.
3. The struggle, as the kids like to say, is very, very real.
4. Literally dying right now because cats are hella impressionable.
5. The internet: where productivity goes to die.
6. In offices and schoolrooms all across America, this exact convo is playing out in real time every morning this week.
7. Because everyone knows you aren’t an official couple until you’ve shared a Halloween together.
8. This is the droid you’ve been looking fur! (Sorry for the Star Wars pun, not sorry for the Star Wars pun.)
9. That feeling when you stumble deep into an internet rabbit hole only to resurface even stronger for it.
10. While the struggle may or may not be imagined, the budgetary constraints aren’t. :(
11. But if we’re being completely honest here, Halloween is no time for self-control.
12. Cats are gullible (see #3 above), but they’re also animal ninjas that are watching you at all times. Come correct or you’ll get wrecked.
13. Cosigning on this idea because it’s total fire.
14. On the value of setting limits and prioritizing your time accordingly.
15. Go on, tell us more ...
16. Representation matters, y’all.
17. This poor little woofer wins all of the snugs.
18. When you’re a Halloween all-star but you’re more concerned about making it go smoothly for the rookie in your crew. #SquadGoals
19. Remember: 73.6% of all statistics are made up on the spot. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
20. I’ve been this person. You’ve been this person. We’ve all been this person.
21. When you road test the new material before the big night and everyone’s happy with the rehearsal.
22. Timely reminder to stay in your lane this Halloween.
23. *Raises hand in solidarity*
24. No judgement here; this is a safe space.
25. Bringing this list to a conclusion with words of wisdom from a modern day poet.