Did you know that no cat has ever been fed in the history of cats?
That's the takeaway from a now viral tweet hitting on an everyday truth that's both factually accurate and ha-ha hilarious.
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"What I love about cats is how they, collectively, as a species, have never been fed, ever," wrote user phenomenell on the social media platform.
The v. relatable observation quickly spawned a sprawling exchange and unlike other more contentious Twitter threads, consensus was immediately reached: Cats are filthy little liars and their plaintive protests of famished enfeeblement are not to be believed under any circumstance.
The responses came fast and they came furious and we've assembled the best of the bunch below for your scrolling pleasure.
"I would like a food please. Look at my hungry belly"
Likely to perish on the spot right hecking meow if no action is taken.
[casually nudges bowl towards their peoples in suggestive fashion]
"Five years of starvation and cruelty has driven Meg to putting herself into a coffin. 😥"
When you are resigned to your lot in life.
"this is how my cat sees himself in the morning before I give him food"
BRB, off to have this printed, framed, and hung in the Good Tweet Hall of Fame.
"You've slept in 30 whole minutes, I'm seconds away from death."
A little urgency, please.
"Wow I can see every bone in his withered body."
Drastic times call for drastic measures.
"I don’t know when I decided my cats talk like Victorian orphans but I’m liking it"
Illustration by Hannah Hillam.
"Madeleine can see the light. 11 years old and never fed once."
Where does she find the will to carry on in the face of such hardship?
"What is love?"
"Form without function is just an empty vessel. It's only in usage that an item has utility." -- this cat, probably
"All eyes on me as I go into the kitchen where rumor has it, there’s food in there."
Sound the alarm, this is not a drill.
"Wasting away from 14 years of starvation"
Paws folded for effect because cats are expert guiltrippers.
"Weak from hunger. Never been fed. Mysteriously Large, however."
Girth without the grub is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.
"Everybody needs a side hustle these days and cats are no exception."
[extreme Thanos voice: "Fine, I'll do it myself."]
"Glory doesn’t get dinner ever but I make her watch me eat." (Hover over to play.)
"this guy is always starving, I have apparently not fed him for his entire life"
Someone report this monster to PETA.
"Cecil stares at an empty plate, longing for meals he’s never been given, wondering when his suffering will end"
The crumbs on the plate are there only to prolong the agony.
"My Ted's not angry about my starving him, just disappointed."
The indignity of it all.
"Do other cats get fed? I never have."
Asking for a fren.
Have you ever fed your cat 😉? Tell us about their chronic complaining in the comments below or on our Facebook page.