Let's get this out of the way: There are no dumb dogs, there are just dogs who are less smart.
That's the takeaway from a now viral thread on Twitter, in which people are sharing their pups' less graceful moments. Some might call them lowlights, but we find them relatable as heck.
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"Please tell me about your dumbest dog," asked Twitter user Bum Phillips, a college football writer with nearly 140,000 followers.
Challenge officially issued, folks on the microblogging platform quickly leaned into the ask with a flood of funny anecdotes, the best and funniest of which are collected below.
1. "Literally this morning tried to poop on an incline and then got so distracted by the poop rolling down the hill that she fell over"
2. "Tried to bite his reflection in the refrigerator"
3. "Everytime someone gets in the bath tub, Blue figures he needs to be in there as well."
4. "My brother’s dog is forever at war with my office curtain"
"these are all from different days and there are many more"
5. "Behold my dog Frida, who ate a whole stack of kraft singles while I was in the shower."
(Don't worry, she didn't eat any plastic and ended up sleeping it off—as one does.)
6. "He chewed a hole in the grill cover and then got stuck in it."
7. "Routinely climbs up to the top of the third floor stairs—knowing full well he's too scared to go back down the stairs—and whines until someone comes to get him."
8. "Vicktor likes walls"
9. "Cousin’s labradoodle somehow consists of 2 out of the 6 'smartest' breeds"
10. "Where do I pick up the award?"
11. "The puppy will only chew something if he’s in the backyard, but he will chew anything in the backyard."
12. "My dog cuddles with an <empty> peanut butter filled pretzels container."
13. "Do you have all day? Because I have just the dog for you ... "
14. "'Get a lab,' they said. 'The breed is whip-smart,' they said"
15. "That's no how it works, my dude." (Press play to watch.)
16. "stares at walls" (likely because he can hear the neighbor watching tv)
17. "in his youth this dummo used to flip a laundry basket over his head and run through the house"
Got a funny story about your dog? Share it in the comments below!